So, here we are. Again.Posted: August 24, 2009
My husband was laid off on Friday. It was sudden (to me), but apparently he had heard rumors for a few weeks before, and had started to look for other jobs in the meantime.
He was laid off last June as well. This makes 2 jobs in a row that he was laid off from.
I don’t even pretend to know what it feels like to be told that you are not needed anymore and shooed out the door. I’ve never been laid off (cross your fingers) and have been at my job for over 14 years. This layoff is different from last year’s – he actually loved this job and wanted to move up in the company and actually have a career with this company. He loved his employees and co-workers, and even though it was hard work, he enjoyed it most of the time. He put in extra hours every week and volunteered to help other stores when they needed it – he went above and beyond for this company. For them to lay him off like they did – no severance, no thank you, no nothing – just about killed him, which in turn just about killed me. I think that’s what hurt the most (besides the loss of about 60% of our family income!).
Now that I’ve had 3 days to process everything, have my freakouts, and attempt to get our money straight, I’m a little calmer. It sucks being married to someone that’s been laid off, and I know that how I act can make a huge impact on Kevin’s state of mind. I don’t even know if he reads this blog, but here goes:
* When I come home from work and ask what you did today, I’m not nagging. I genuinely want to know if you found anything interesting and if any progress has been made. I have no doubt that you are as scared as I am, and I know that you are busting your butt to find a new job/career. Please just let me ask without getting offended.
* As much as I claim to be independent, I still need you (and your income!). I can do a lot of things without you, but not everything. I know that you want to be the provider and take care of your family – and hopefully soon you can be that provider again. Until then, follow my lead (moneywise) and things will be okay.
* It is not your fault that you were laid off. I know this doesn’t help right now, but it was completely based on seniority. Last one in, first one out. It’s not personal, even though I know it must feel like it. You took it much better than I would have and I am proud of you for that. The way that your ex-company handled things was far less than admirable, and they should be ashamed of themselves for some of the things that were said and done (and also unsaid and not done). It makes me sad that you can give so much of your life to a company and not get so much as a “thank you”.
* Since we won’t have much extra money to play with, we will be hanging out together a lot. No more “shopping Sundays” for me and no more movie dates/dinner for us for a while. We have DirecTV, Tivo, and the lovely internet. We’ll be okay. We are not getting rid of any of those things since they will be our main source of entertainment for a while – I figure $100/month is doable.
* Cancelling our trips SUCKS. I was really looking forward to going to Austin with you over Labor Day weekend. However, still going is not the responsible thing to do, so we aren’t. It really sucks being a grown up. We WILL go and we WILL have a blast and do everything we want to do when you find a new job. We will do this to celebrate making it through yet another layoff together. We can do this.