My first “commissioned” jewelry order!

Since I work at a jewelry store, I am familiar with how jewelry is made/put together. As a hobby, I have made jewelry for myself – nothing crazy, just simple pieces. Obviously I don’t have a solder machine or welder at my house, so I can only do so much.

Well, my husband apparently bragged about my latest jewelry-making session to the ladies he works with. A few weeks ago, he came home with a baggie of assorted brass-colored pieces, a large octopus pendant, and a chart for a three layer necklace – from his boss.

Seriously? I do this as a hobby for myself! No pressure, right? Well, the ladies he works with made my craft room blackout curtains – he works at a rug and fabric store, isn’t that handy? – so I felt obligated to at least try to do what she wanted. After threatening him asking him nicely to not talk about my extracurricular activities while he is at work, I stared at the pieces for a week or so. Then I bought some “antique gold” chains and findings, and some sea glass looking beads. No, this is not real gold. I’m not made of money, and I’m not great at making jewelry – so this was all from Joann and Michaels. With coupons. Never pay full price at either one of those stores!

Today, I decided to get with it. I woke up in a bad mood and probably didn’t need to be around people any more than I had to be, so I locked myself up in my craft room for the afternoon and ended up with this:

I went a little crazy. I taught myself how to do a wire wrap on a bead (holy crap! Now I want to wrap everything!) and went to town. I sent my husband out to Harbor Freight, land of cheapass tools, for a precision plier kit because my tools just weren’t working out.

Once I made the necklace, I had extra chains, pendants, and beads left. I went ahead and made a matching bracelet. Then I felt like I needed to complete the set, so off I went to Joann again to buy some ear wires.

I hope she likes it – my husband says “the gaudier, the better” – since Kevin has talked me up so much, I feel like I have these really high standards to live up to!  We shall see tomorrow…

Also posted at RCHOTX

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Five.

Five years ago tomorrow, Logan made me an aunt. I spoil him rotten, but that’s my job. I love that kid so much – I had no idea I could love that much.

Dear Logan,

You will be 5 tomorrow. FIVE! It seems like you were born yesterday. In one moment, you changed our whole family – not just your mommy and daddy, but everyone. I don’t remember much of what happened before you were with us. It’s been such a great 5 years.

I will never, ever forget keeping you for the first time. You might have been 4 or 5 months old? Your mommy was finally going somewhere without you. I’m going to be honest here, I couldn’t wait for her to get back. You obviously did not want anything to do with me, and that’s okay. I can laugh about it now. I very clearly remember just sitting in the floor of your nursery, holding you, bawling my eyes out right along with you. I just could not figure out what you wanted, and at that point we had both given up. Your mommy still teases me about that night. It’s just not right, is it?

The night from hell - before Mommy left you with horrible Aunt Heather.

Uncle Kevin and I were talking just last night about how you talk all the time now. He said that he missed you calling him “Kay-in”, and I replied that I didn’t miss being called “whore”. I know that you can say my name perfectly fine, but I am perfectly fine with you calling me “Hewwer” for the rest of your life. Sometimes I wonder if you do it because you know I love it when you say that. You’re pretty smart.

Crawling through playground tunnels like a big boy at Gouda Gouda's and Salma Hayek's going away party.

Boy, are you smart. I know everyone thinks their kid/nephew/dog is a genius, but I really think you might be really, really smart. Probably not a genius, because you’ve got some iffy genes from both sides of the family to overcome (hee hee), but close. You whiz through workbooks at lightning speed. You never cease to amaze us with your random knowledge – “echo location” is the one that comes to mind right now. What 3-4 year old knows how bats and dolphins communicate and can correctly explain it for idiots like me? That’s right. You.

"ICE" at the Gaylord. You love Christmas. You made Christmas awesome again.

Lately, when I come to your house, you run at me and hug me. (In the recent past, I was ignored because “PBS Kids” was on) You have no idea how much I love your hugs and kisses. Sometimes I call your mommy and ask to talk to you, because you cheer me up. You can make my bad mood turn into a good mood. You’re probably the only person in the world that has that kind of power (well, I will make an exception for Ryan Reynolds. He could turn a bad mood into a good mood, but in a totally different way). Anyway. I hope that you will always hug me and give me kisses. I know you won’t, and I don’t want to think about that day, but we’ll see. Maybe I can force you into it or something.

See what I mean? Two totally different kinds of good moods. I love you both.

Logan, I hope you know that I will always be here for you no matter what. When you’re 13 and hate your mom, it would be wise of you to not hate me as well. You can hide out at my house anytime (well, once you get over your fear of dogs), but rest assured, your mother will be kept up to date. Within reason. I hope that you will always feel like you can trust me, and know that I will do anything in the world for you. I love love love you, and I just want you to know that. You are such a big, smart, happy little boy and seeing you brightens my whole world. Every single time. 

Love,

Aunt Hewwer

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


On not wanting children.

This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately – maybe because I’m about to turn 35, maybe because I doubt myself at times, maybe because I don’t have enough stress in my life?! At any rate, it’s been on my mind lately.

I don’t want kids. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE kids. I love my nephew like he is my own, and I love my friends’ kids like they are my own. In fact, my husband and I are the godparents to many of them!

I assumed that my mind would change as I got married/got older/watched friends have kids and that I would become a mom. My mind never changed! If I was sure of anything, it was that having children was not in my future. Luckily, my husband and I are on the same page. However, if I had married someone that thought it was important to have kids, I would have had them. We discussed kids at length before we got married – and we agreed.

I would guess that my main reason for not wanting children is that I feel like I raised my brother and sister. My mom died when I was 12. I had a younger brother and sister. I grew up very quickly. Dad did everything he could, but I put pressure on myself to help raise them the way my mom would have wanted them raised. I wrote about this a couple of years ago, and I’m guessing that my dad read it and got a little upset because I guess I made it sound like he did not do enough as a parent, that he put too much pressure on me to help him raise them – which could not be further from the truth! All four of us did what we had to do to survive without my mom. My dad did (and still does, to some extent) an excellent job with all of us – he lost his wife, we lost our mother. It was unfair, but it was life. We had to roll with it. And we did. And still do. So, Dad, if you’re reading this – I love you and thank you so much for being a great dad! I don’t know what I would do without you.

I don’t know if things would be different (kid-wise) if my mom were still around. Who knows, maybe I would have come to the same conclusion?

Another reason this has been on my mind is because at age 35, most OB/GYNs will take you seriously when you say you don’t want kids. This summer, I could have a procedure that would make me unable to get pregnant. Ever. That’s a big step. I’m about to begin researching it, checking with insurance, etc. Up until now, the stock answer is, “We won’t do the procedure unless you have already had children or are over 35.” Yep. Cool, huh? Not really.

Part of me feels really selfish for not having children when I am pretty sure I could easily do so. I have so many friends and relatives that are busting their asses to get pregnant — or are adopting due to infertility — and here I am, flaunting my probable fertile-ness. I’ve told my sister many times that she can have all of my reproductive organs – if there were such a transplant, I’d definitely do it for her! She probably doesn’t believe me, but I really would do it.

Then I realize that it would be selfish for me to have kids. I don’t have the means to give a child the life it deserves (although we would definitely make it work if something were to happen, of course), I don’t have the patience to be a 24/7 caregiver/mommy, and I (selfishly) enjoy my alone time. It helps that I can admit that, right?

Instead of having children of my own, I choose every single day to “adopt” the kids I know and love. These are my chosen kids and I would do anything for them. I’m Aunt Heather/Hedder/Hewwer/Feather, spoiler of children. I get so much love and joy from all the kids in my life. I get all the fun parts (well, most of the time). I can borrow a kid any time I need an excuse to go to the museum, the zoo, a kids’ movie, whatever. Kids are drawn to my husband as well. It’s really strange. We’re the couple that doesn’t want children, but the kids flock to us.

I’m okay with that 🙂


This one’s for you!

You know who you are.

You’re the one who made a little backhanded comment about my last blog post. Do you think I don’t find out about these things?

I think it’s really sad that you are so narrow-minded that you can’t see past your front door. What little fantasy world do you live in? I also find it funny that you use your religion as an excuse for your intolerance. It’s interesting that you pick and choose when you are “religious”, depending on your specific needs for that day. At least I don’t pretend to be something I’m not.

I can only hope that your children grow up with a more open mind than yours. Unfortunately, people like you tend to pass down hate. I hope that they know better. I hope to God that if it was your child that was gay, you would love him/her unconditionally.

Keep your nasty, immature comments to yourself. If you don’t like it, don’t read it. Don’t follow my page on Facebook (oops, I took care of that for you already), don’t follow me on Pinterest, and don’t talk about what I write if you’re going to be an idiot.

I thought about deleting my post. I thought about making it password-protected. You know what? This is MY blog. These are MY thoughts. I understand that everyone has differing opinions on things, and I respect that. I do not, however, tolerate the behind-the-back bullshit. If you have something to say, say it to ME. I am proud of what I wrote, and your feelings on the matter will never change that. I had Britt’s blessing to write it, and she is proud of what she did as well (as she should be!).

The things you say just make you sound uneducated. Here are some links so you can educate yourself.

Human Rights Campaign

Speak Out

Arguing Equality

Freedom to Marry

I pity you. You know who you are.


This year…

I want to relax more. Not worry about every single little thing. Smile more. Sleep more. Do less (if I want to). Do more (if I want to). Make weekly meal plans and (somewhat) stick to them. Deep clean my house and keep it clean. Move. Find out why I have a constant sinus infection. Spend more time with my nephew – I know that the “sweet, cuddly, little boy” time I have left with him is going way too fast. Spend more time with my husband. WITH him. Not in the house, not in a different room, but WITH HIM. Be more patient – with my husband and everyone else that requires my attention. Go back to California. Take an awesome trip to Atlanta. Spend girl time in Savannah. Spend more time with my friends. Eat out less, eat at home more. Be a nicer person. Read 36 books at a minimum. Make crafty things instead of just looking at them and thinking, “I could do that”. Go to Austin for a few days with Kevin. Spend time with my precious Booda – he is almost 10 years old and I want to get as many cuddles in with him as I can before he is no longer with us on earth. See my grandmothers and grandfather more often. Volunteer somewhere. Exercise 3-4 days a week, even if it only involves walking around the block. Find a yoga class that works with my budget and schedule. Prepare freezer meals. Make a quilt top – possibly do a whole quilt, but we’ll just see how that goes. Be happy with what I have. Realize that my problems are minute compared to the rest of the world.


Is it June yet?

A few months ago, my friend Brittaney (who STILL hasn’t put anything on her blog) told me about Haven Conference. It’s a DIY/Blogging conference that will be held in June 2012 in Atlanta, and she thought we needed to go.

We got a group together, bought tickets, and we’re going. They just announced some of the speakers and the sessions yesterday, and I am so excited now! (Like I wasn’t before).

One of the girls (Creative Kristi) going to Haven put together a Linky party for Haven attendees – I feel a little out of my league joining these women (and men) but I’m doing it anyway!

Haven Attendees Links   

There are still a few tickets left, so if you think you might want to go next year – get one!


Yeah, I suck.

I’m a slacker. I admit it. I’ve been sick/lazy/bored/sleepy/busy and have not made time (don’t get me wrong, I have HAD the time – I just have chosen not to spend it blogging) to blog lately. That has to change!

SO, I found a new blog called “Mama’s Losin’ It” and she has a writer’s workshop. Basically, she gives ideas on what to write about. We’ll see if that gets me back in the groove of things – something has to, this is worth a shot!

The first prompt I found and liked is:

List ten things you are currently sick of.

Now if you know me, you know that this will probably be really easy for me to write. Ha! Here goes!

 

Ten Things I am Currently Sick Of: (in no specific order)

* Politics – I’m not sure what is in store for us next November. I don’t think I even want to know, especially if Rick Perry gets that far. Kill me now.

Yeah, real stupid.

* Hot weather – It’s October, Texas! Quit teasing me with your cool nights already. Bring it. I miss my sweaters!

* Sports – While I am so excited that the Texas Rangers are in the World Series, and I have been watching the games (at least most of them), I am tired of them. They have stolen my husband, and more importantly, my living room television. Ha! I know some of my friends are going to be so pissed at me for writing that I’m sick of sports, but I am, and it’s my blog, so suck it! Football sucks too. I’m an equal opportunity hater.

* Rude people – Look, I know that rude people are one of the (many) hazards of working retail, but that doesn’t mean I have to love them. Luckily, my store/company seems like it has a disproportionately small amount of meanies, but oh man – when we do, it’s a doozy. Having to deal with rude customers has made me a much nicer person when I am out shopping/eating, etc. I know that rude people are everywhere, but I’ve dealt with enough to know that I don’t want to add myself to that population.

* DirecTV – I’m tired of paying right around $100/month for you. That’s all. I know, it was my choice, blah blah blah, but I am so over you. I’ve got the internet.

* Mud – I’m happy that we have been getting a small amount of rain, but the mud afterwards sucks – especially when you have a 1.5 year old puppy that loves to play in it, but does not love to get his feet wiped off. As a result, we have huge mud chunks everywhere. Just when you think you have gotten them all, not so much.

* Not having much disposable income – We are luckier than a lot of people, but that doesn’t mean I’m happy with our income! I’m just being honest here. I love to shop – especially bargain shop – but we just haven’t had the extra cash money to do it. I’ve gotten used to not being able to buy whatever I want, whenever I want, but I’m not a fan of that! We have everything we need (and then some) but I want more! Is that so wrong?

* My house – We have lived in this tiny house for 6.5 years. 2 bedrooms, 1 bath. It’s old. It’s small. (It’s cheap, though – and that’s more important than anything else right now. If we had a huge rent bill every month, we would have been screwed long ago – so we stay. And stay. And stay.) I need more room. I want to be able to have my nephew come spend the night. I want a nice kitchen so I will want to cook again someday. I’m a brat, I know.

* Gasoline prices –  Do I even need to go into more detail here? I guess I should shut up, though. A girl I work with just went to Hawaii for her honeymoon and had to pay $5.50/gallon. Holy crap.

* My mattresses – I laid down on a Tempurpedic at the State Fair last week and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since. I weep when I think of how comfortable I could be, and I weep even more when I think of how much it would cost me to be that comfortable. Someday, someday. I’m totally worth it.

 

That was really difficult, believe it or not. I felt like I was grasping at straws after the first 3 or 4. I’m pretty happy these days – I’ve got great friends, great family, health insurance, income, a place to live, a car, two dogs that love me – what else do I need?